Today we are looking at one of the fundamentals of self-improvement – the winner’s mindset. In fact, I would go so far as to argue that it may be the single most important tool you need on your self-improvement journey.
The Winner’s Mindset
OK, what is the winner’s mindset? I define it as follows.
The winner’s mindset is a fundamental belief that someone has about themselves. It is the sense that he or she is a winner, that most life experiences will turn out to be successes, that failure is a temporary circumstance that can be overcome with adjustments, and most importantly, that one deserves to have the best things in life.
Let’s break that definition down piece by piece to understand it more.
The winner’s mindset is a fundamental belief that someone has about themselves. . .
The winner’s mindset should be one of your core beliefs. On good days and bad, after wins and losses, when all is well and when all sucks – you should feel somewhere deep inside that you are good, smart, capable, and able to overcome. If you don’t feel this, it likely stems from self-confidence issues. Trust me when I say that I struggled with this mindset growing up.
You can’t just get a winner’s mindset overnight if you don’t have it now. It will take time to develop but the method is pretty simple. You have to start loving yourself and treating yourself as a friend. It sounds cliche, but seriously, hear me out for a minute, because if you truly understand this, so many other challenges in life will be solved.
No matter where you are at in life right now, you deserve your love. At the end of the day, friends may desert you. Family may let you down. Health can fail, money can disappear, and jobs can be cut unceremoniously. Most of us put our own self-confidence into the hands of other people. IF they have a good job, IF they have a great girlfriend or boyfriend, IF they are sitting pretty financially, THEN they think well of themselves. But if they lose one, or worse, all of those things, they then see themselves as failures and losers.
You may be thinking this way right now. I know I did in the past.
But you know what? In this whole world, no one knows you better than you. Noone knows your struggles and challenges, hopes and fears, like you do. You need to become your own best friend.
Think about it. If your friend loses his job, what do you do? Laugh at him? Call him a failure? A loser? Tell him he’s doomed? Of course not. You will remind your friend of his strong points, offer any assistance, give encouragement, root for him and believe he’ll ger through it.
How much better would your life be like if you started treating yourself the same way you treat your friends? Or even further, if you genuinely loved yourself? Look in the mirror, see that face looking back at you and honestly say, “Wow, we’ve been through so much together. I love you, keep going, I believe in you.”
That is what winners do. They believe in themselves.
What if you don’t feel it? Say it anyway. Our brains have a way of syncing up our feelings with our words. So even if you feel outmatched, overwhelmed, and ready to give up, don’t. Go to the mirror, look yourself in the face, and say the words you need to hear. Be your best friend. Love yourself.
OK, if you can do that, the rest is easy.
. . . It is the sense that he or she is a winner . . .
You are a winner. You aren’t defined by your mistakes. Everone makes those. Especially people who try to accomplish something. You are a winner. Even if you haven’t scored a big win in your life, you are a winner who has just hasn’t reached your true destination yet. You are a winner.
. . . that most life experiences will turn out to be successes. . .
Unsatisfied with your current job? You career still has a long way to go and you can still reach your goals. Have a bad relationship with one of your friends? Work on fixing it. Or if it can’t be fixed, work on finding a better friend. Your current state does not dictate your end result. Believe that in the end, you will achieve your desires.
If you live in Kansas, and your goal is to see the Atlantic Ocean, you’ll spend lots of time traveling and never see the beach until the very end of your trip. If you don’t see the sand yet, keep going!
. . . that failure is a temporary circumstance that can be overcome with adjustments. . .
Quote me on this because it isone of the smarter things I’ve ever said – “Never change your dream; frequently change your methodology.”
This means, when you screw up and don’t get the result you want, please don’t give up on your goal. Just change your tactics abit. If you want to get a great job and you crashed and burned on your last 3 interviews, don’t take it as a sign that you can’t get the job you want. Instead change tactics. Update your resume. Practice some interviewing with friends. Modify some of the answers you have been giving. Or shoot for a less challenging role now, learn some more, and then try for your dream job next year.
Change your tactics; hold fast to your goal.
. . . and that one deserves to have the best things in life.
No one on this planet is more valuable than you. You matter as much as anyone. Your dreams matter. You deserve to experience the life that you want.
Believe in your inherent worth. Never sacrifice your mission in life to placate others. You deserve your dreams and this world deserves a confident, motivated you!
The Winner’s Creed
To help you internalize the the winner’s mindset, I’ve written the Winner’s Creed. Save it as your wallpaper, share it, and live by it!
All the best,